The Hidden Barrier to Crushing Every Area of Life: Permission & Approval

Do you ever feel like you’re holding yourself back in life or business, waiting for the “right” time, more validation, or the perfect circumstances? If so, you might be dealing with a hidden barrier that’s more common than you think: the need for permission and approval.

Now, you might be thinking, “I don’t need anyone’s permission or approval.” But here’s the reality: your subconscious mind is sneaky. It’s been conditioned over time to seek validation—even when you don’t realize it.

In this post, we’re going to explore how the need for permission and approval affects your life, business, and relationships. More importantly, you’ll learn how to break free from this cycle and start giving yourself the permission you need to move forward.

Ready to uncover what’s been holding you back? Let’s dive in!

The Psychology Behind Permission & Approval

From the time we’re young, we’re conditioned to seek permission—from our parents, teachers, and society at large. Think about it: whether it was asking for permission to leave the dinner table or needing a teacher’s approval to move forward with a project, we’ve been trained to look for external validation before taking action.

But here’s the kicker: this pattern of seeking approval doesn’t stop when we grow up. Even as adults, this mindset seeps into our relationships, business decisions, and life goals. We start waiting for permission from other people, life events, or even circumstances to tell us when it’s “okay” to move forward.

For example, have you ever caught yourself saying:

• “Once I make more money, then I’ll start working fewer hours.”
• “Once I reach this milestone, then I’ll start prioritizing my health.”

That’s your subconscious waiting for external permission. In reality, you’re putting your life and goals on hold, waiting for the universe to give you a green light that you never really needed.

How the Need for Permission & Approval Shows Up in Different Areas of Life

1. In Your Business

For online coaches, entrepreneurs, and business owners, this barrier often shows up as a fear of visibility or rejection. You might find yourself thinking:

• “Once I gain more experience, then I’ll start charging higher rates.”
• “Once I get more followers, then I’ll start putting myself out there.”

Here’s the truth: you don’t need more experience or followers. You need to stop seeking approval from external factors before you feel ready to step up. You already have the tools you need.

2. In Relationships

This mindset shows up in relationships when you feel the need to prove yourself or seek validation from your partner, friends, or family. You might hold back from expressing your needs or setting boundaries because you’re waiting for their approval to take action.

3. In Life Decisions

Have you ever delayed making a big decision because you were waiting for the “right” time or perfect circumstances? You might think, “Once I have more savings, then I’ll start my business,” or “Once I get this qualification, then I’ll be ready for a career change.”

In reality, you’re waiting for life itself to give you permission to take the next step—but the only permission you need is the one you give yourself.

How to Break Free from the Need for Permission & Approval

Here’s the key takeaway: you don’t need permission from anyone or anything to live the life you want. The only permission you need is the one you give yourself. Here’s how to break free from this approval-seeking pattern:

1. Stop Waiting for the “Perfect” Time

There’s never going to be a perfect time. Life doesn’t hand out permission slips, and if you keep waiting for one, you’ll stay stuck exactly where you are.

The truth is, there’s no event or milestone that will suddenly make you feel ready—you just have to start before you feel fully ready.

2. Give Yourself Permission

This one is huge: start practicing self-permission. Instead of waiting for someone else to approve your ideas or validate your decisions, give yourself the go-ahead. This could look like:

• Setting new boundaries in a relationship.
• Launching your new offer, even if you don’t feel 100% ready.
• Raising your rates or making a bold move in your business.

The more you practice giving yourself permission, the easier it becomes to break free from needing external validation.

3. Catch Your Thought Patterns

Start paying attention to your internal dialogue. Every time you catch yourself saying, “Once I do X, then I’ll do Y,” stop and ask yourself, “Why do I think I need this event or milestone to move forward?”

Most of the time, the barrier is purely mental, and you’ve been holding yourself back without realizing it.

4. Reframe Your Mindset

Start reframing how you think about milestones, money, and external achievements. Instead of viewing them as permission slips, see them as outcomes that result from action. For example, instead of thinking, “Once I make more money, I’ll start investing in my business,” flip it to:

• “By investing in my business, I’ll create more money.”

You can start living in alignment with your goals right now, without waiting for external validation.

A Personal Story About Permission & Approval

Let me share something personal with you. For years, I was always waiting for external events to make me ready. I would think, “Once I hit this income goal, then I’ll take that next step,” or “Once I gain more experience, then I’ll feel qualified to charge more.”

But then I realized: if I kept waiting for life to tell me I was ready, I’d stay stuck forever. So one day, I decided to give myself permission. I stopped waiting for external validation, and guess what? Nothing bad happened! In fact, I started enjoying life more because I was no longer living on hold.

The moment I started making decisions from self-permission, rather than waiting for approval, everything changed for me.

Take Action: Give Yourself Permission

Here’s my challenge for you: pay attention to those moments where you’re waiting for permission. Whether it’s from people, circumstances, or events, notice when you’re saying, “Once I do this, then I’ll…”

Catch yourself in that pattern and start giving yourself permission to take the next step right now.

Final Thoughts: The Only Permission You Need is Your Own

The truth is, you don’t need permission or approval from anyone or anything to live the life you want. The only person you’ve been waiting on is you.

So, if you’re ready to break the cycle of seeking approval, start by giving yourself the permission you’ve been waiting for. You’ve already got everything you need to take your next step.

And if you’re in the coaching or business world, understanding how this permission and approval loop works is gold for your clients and messaging. Use it to show them how to break out of their own cycles and start moving toward the life they want.

💬 Comment below: Where have you been waiting for permission in your life, and what’s the next step you’re ready to take? Let me know in the comments—I’d love to hear from you!

If you’re ready to dive deeper into strategies for leveling up your life and business, hit the subscribe button for more content like this. And remember—you don’t need anyone’s permission to start crushing it. You’ve got this!